Monday, February 6, 2012

Success Sutras Satire Indian Context

Success Sutras”

Once upon a time, Long long ago(In 2005.If you think this is not long long ago compare the speed of Pentium Processor in 2005 & 2010) A man was frustrated by failures in his life.

He decided to follow the rich Indian trend and went to forest for Tapasya. After a lot of Tapasya, Deva arrived and asked “Bhakt what do you want”. Bhakt pleaded that he wanted to know about the secrets of suceess.

Deva was perplexed and he offered “Ask any luxury of the world ,Any amount of money ,Apsaras and you will get it”. But Bhakt was very stubborn and he was rigid on getting the Knowledge of Success Sutras.

At last the Deva relented and asked “Do you have any previous grooming on Success Sutras”.

Bhakt thought for some time and then he answered “Yes,I have studied many books and learnt that key to success is Hard work, Labour, Honesty, Integrity, Consideration of Others. One other thing which I have studied is the Sutra ‘I win ,You Win’. I always try to cooperate with others .”

Hearing these words Deva Burst into Laughter.

.After some time when he was able to speak, He said “You got the wrong Sutras Bhakt. This I win You win ‘is a lie, a farce. Remember your parents nagging you for getting less marks from your neighbours kid. No race (competition) will be a true race( competition) if every body wins. You were programmed to compete and beat others.”

“Listen Dear Bhakt I can dwell on Wrongs of your Sutras for a long Time. But I have to go some where so I am just giving you new Sutras. Hey Bhakt these Sutras are Sutra of all successful people . “

“So listen carefully .If you follow these principles, you and your next generations will be successful for ever. And don’t tell these Sutras to others because You need to leave others behind ”.

(Eventually Bhakt Told the secret to his wife, who passed on these to her friends ,and so on. That’s how These Sutras travelled and eventually hit me .Actually Deva knew this because he could look into the future. That’s the reason that the following sutra are general in nature. Also since Bhakt was a male so all the sutra are for males. Females can replace he with she and also other words with their gender specific words. Like they can replace word wife with Husband whenever encountered .)

Deva continued “So Hey Bhakt Follow these principles and you will be successful within a year. I can guarantee this. Actually it depends on you .Some People got success within a month. So your Master is..”

Bhakt interrupted “Sorry for interruption, Deva What is a Master ?”

Deva smiled and told “Master is the person who is crucial to achieving Success. He may be The Teacher who will decide your Grade. He may be the Boss who will give you promotion. He may be the MLA,MP or Minister who can get you transferred to your favorite place, who can allot you Petrol Pump. Master can be your Girlfriend whom you want to marry (This line was not for Bhakt Who was already married. This is only for Bachelors)

“Listen carefully Dear Bhakt I am going to share the first Sutra”


Sutra 1 Master is the Ultimate truth

“Hey Bhakt,Your Master is the ultimate truth. He thinks truth, he writes truth, he speaks truth. Yours days and nights are not related to the rest of world. If the master says “It’s a day” then only consider it a day. Only Idiots try to find errors with their Masters.

If your teacher says two plus two is five, Admit it and devise ways to prove this. Only Idiot student corrects teacher when he/she is wrong. Gyani students who strive to attain success(Good Grades) never try to correct their Teachers.

Similarly in Ofiice, best way to approach a problem is the way suggested by Boss .Follow that way blindly because this is the way of achievers. Ignorants try to correct their bosses. Gyanis never find fault with the speech and writings of their boss. Higher level Gyanis go one step further and always use sentences like “Yes Sir, Very True Sir, You are right Sir” while their boss is speaking.

In business too Contractor have to assume that every word of the person ,who is giving contract, truth, Nothing but eternal truth. Otherwise the ignorant contractor is doomed to suffer.

For those in love, They are already following this Sutras. And those who are not following, they are not in love. Similarly wise man never find fault with their girlfriends otherwise they are doomed to celebrate Valentines day alone (Replace the word girlfriend with wife for married. But don’t replace wife with girlfriend)

So Dear Bhakta time has come to you the second Sutra”


Sutra 2 “ Master is Family”


“Dear Bhakt your only family is your Master. Lesser Mortals regard their wife, Children, Parents, Siblings as their families. But Gyanis know the truth that Master is family. They don’t misutilize their time in getting milk , ration, Railway tickets for their Original families. Instead they use the precious time to get milk for their Teacher, Boss or the Master.”

“So hey Bhakt Forget about your kids crying for milk. Concentrate on milk for Tommy of Master (Yes you guessed right.Tommy is a dog).This is the path of winners. Road for success is the road where you will take Tommy for Walk.”

“This is your headache to arrange for the RailTickets, Cinema Tickets and other tickets for your Master. If you do not do, this you are doomed to perish. High level Gyanis even don’t take money for these tickets. This is the Height of Gyan. Strive to go up to This Level.”

“Hey Bhakt Limit your life to Milk, Ration ,Tickets of Your Master and you will get the marks, promotion and Contract”

Bhakta Interuppted “Swami What about my original Family. How I will get time for them”.

Now Deva was Furious “You Idiot, Do I Have to Tell Everything in Detail. Use your Imagination. Utilize School Time, Office time for this purpose .No one is going to ask you how you took half day for small Job like booking Tickets.Use that time for yourself”

Now We are coming towards the third Sutra

Sutra 3 “Differentiate Yourself from Crowd”

Deva Said “Hey Bhakta,You are not the alone who is striving to get Masters favours. There will be a big crowd trying to be in Masters good books.”

Bhakta Asked “Then What should I do Deva?”

Deva smiled and said “Differentiate yourslf .I am giving you an example. You buy a particular brand of toothpaste because they have demonstrated that it will make your teeth whiter notwithstanding the reality that all the toothpastes are more or less same. “

“Learn from Marketing Tactics of these companies. Make yourself a moon, different from millions of Stars”

“How” was the question.

“Gyanis always know about hobbies of there Masters.The try to develop expertise in that particular field.If the Master is fond of cooking, Get yourself latest book of recipes and half of the battle is won. If Master likes gardening, study Botany and make yourself expert of Plants, trees, Flowers, Seeds etc”

Bhakt was little worried “What if the hobby is very tough like mountaineering. I am unable to become expert”

Deva explained “Don’t worry, In such case try to Become expert in Palmistry, Computer or Share-Market. 90 % of Masters will be interested in one of these and you will attain Moksha (Suceess).

Bhakt was Filled with joy of knowledge. He asked “Deva ,What about Persons for whome I am the Master”

Deva started vanishing and sound came “Some Other Day”


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